


Hijinks

by kamikaze43v3r



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Bad Jokes, Grindelwho?, I Tried, M/M, MACUSA | Magical Congress of the United States of America, Pranks and Practical Jokes, everything is sunshine and rainbows
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-26
Updated: 2017-04-26
Packaged: 2018-10-24 04:43:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10734348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kamikaze43v3r/pseuds/kamikaze43v3r
Summary: Where Graves is the practical joker of MACUSA but no one dares to say a thing until the new Aurors come in and he tries to impress one of them.Graves thinks he's fucking hilarious. It’s a tragedy no one understands his genius, really.





	Hijinks

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hardeight](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hardeight/gifts).



> This is me attempting humour. Sadly I have no beta, for I am an alpha, iykwim *wink wink*
> 
> Excuse my terrible jokes you will have to survive through them in this fic.

Graves loves his job, he really does. 

Being the Director of Magical Security is tough, anyone with common sense can tell you that. The amount of responsibility and skill needed to herald and oversee the safety of the magical folk in America is staggering, and would do any weaker wizard in. But Percival Graves has been the best at his job for the past five years and isn’t relinquishing his role any time soon.

Of course, with such a huge job, it also brings a lot of stress. So Graves does some things to find some enjoyment in his work. Like making his own coffee, ordering his goons around (“They are your  _ Aurors _ , Graves, not your  _ goons _ ,” Seraphina reminds him every time), or sneaking some time off whenever he feels like it. His favourite, however, is pulling pranks on unsuspecting victims.

Yes, it may surprise everyone, that Percival Graves pulls pranks. He does it good enough that  _ nobody _ knows he’s pulling them. Graves would tell anyone who won’t freeze up in fear upon his presence that he’s a funny man and quite the joker. He tells the most  _ hilarious  _ jokes, but it’s just that no one gets them. The closest to anyone actually reacting to his jokes would be Abernathy (suckup), Tina (full of nervous laughter) and Seraphina, who mostly tells him to shut up and get back to work.

His favourite victims for his pranks are the newbies. They get a fresh batch of graduates from the Academy each year and some transfers from other divisions in other times. Most graduates get their first jobs in the headquarters, and after a few months, they are sent out to other areas in America. Graves thinks as the Director, he should make their time more memorable while they’re there, so he finds the chance to think up a prank or two every time. His favourite trick is Transfiguring his collar pins to real scorpions or spiders and have the arachnids on his neck the entire day while the graduates watch on nervously. None of them dare to bring Graves’ attention to the spiders, only staring at his neck with an anxious smile. He finds great pleasure watching them scream with their eyes and tightly closed mouths as the spiders crawl around his neck and shoulders. The rare ones who do point them out are rewarded with a deadpan stare from the Director, only to make them skitter away and apologize profusely for bothering him.

Graves is fucking hilarious. It’s a tragedy no one understands his genius, really.

This year’s batch of graduates should be interesting. He’s heard from Tina that they have a graduate with the highest grades in both studies and practical and is from Hogwarts rather than Ilvermorny. He supposes he’ll look out for the special snowflake. He just hopes he’s not another Abernathy.

The orientation day comes soon enough. Graves is swamped with work for that particular day, and he almost has the mind to skip it, but he wants to at least prank some kids before the day is over. 

Once he’s breezed through some paperwork, glared through some meetings, and blasted through some half-assed criminal wizards, Graves is back in his office. He hears the group of freshies down the hall with Abernathy as the guide and talking up the Director’s ass as he brings the orientation group to the door of his office. Graves only has time to prepare for The Classic.

A knock follows, and Abernathy’s voice comes through.

“Director Graves, Madame President says that you are available to meet the new Aurors?” Abernathy sounds nervous and eager at the same time, like a puppy giddy with excitement. 

Graves brushes his bushy brows down to make them presentable and imposing. He’s ready.

He magics the door open and Abernathy brings the group inside. It’s a small group, no more than ten. All of them are starstruck; Percival Graves is quite the famous name after all. Almost all of them are in the standard coat and fedora gear, only a few are dressed a little differently. One of them sticks out like a sore thumb but he stands at the back of the group, looking far more distant and like a black gloomy fog than a promising fresh graduate. He’s the only one clad in the darkest black and white, much like a walking funeral, really, and dons an odd Puritan hat with a blue belt.

Graves finds himself distracted by this young man, but he can’t even really see the man’s face, obstructed by the small crowd.

“Sir?” Abernathy interrupts. Graves gives him The Stare™. The man shuts up immediately.

Graves stands and moves over to the group wordlessly. All of them are nervous as the Director approaches. Some are eagerly smiling up to him. The one closest to him holds out his hand and introduces himself. Graves just stares at him with brow-ful intensity. The freshie swallows and drops his grin. Graves goes to the next Auror and waggles his brows. The Auror smiles tentatively and tries to respond, but Graves waggles his brows harder. The Auror keeps quiet, looking torn on how to respond. His smile twitches but it’s pained and forced.

Graves does the same with all of the Aurors, but everyone is quiet and confused. By the fifth person, no one else is smiling and one or two of them are probably considering a career change, too weirded out by their boss.

He knows he has The Brows and The Stare, and he knows how to make full use of them. Freshies are the best to use them on. He enjoys watching them look so unsure and scared all at the same time. It’s a shame that none of them have enough backbone to laugh at his face.

The last one he comes to is the young man in black. He’s probably in his mid-twenties, but appears younger. Pale skin, almost pallid, but there is a healthy glow to his carved cheeks and a brightness in his dark eyes. He’s taller than Graves by a few inches, but he’s hunched in a little, eyes cast to the floor before they look up to Graves when the man steps up to him.

Graves finally gets a good look of Puritan Hat, and…

And.

And he’s.

He can’t think straight.

He’s struck speechless by the young man. 

_ He’s the most beautiful creature Graves has ever seen. _

But Graves is the Director and he has more self-control than that, so he shakes himself up and gives the young Auror the same treatment as the others. An intense stare. The over-animated waggle of his brows. The narrowing of his eyes and exaggeration of his expressions as he regards the newbie.

And the young man stifles a laugh.

Everyone in the room freezes.

The other freshies near this one are frantically shaking their heads.  _ Don’t laugh at the Director!! _ But the Puritan Hat holds his smile and apologizes quietly. Graves narrows his eyes even further into a squint, his brows becoming one with his eyes. The young man’s shoulders is trembling as he holds his laughter.

Graves can hear the freshies behind him trying to discreetly whisper  _ Stop laughing!! You’re gonna get fired!!! _

“I-I’m sorry sir, but you’re very funny,” Puritan Hat says in between giggles. The rest of the group pale, someone even whimpers and Abernathy is collecting his jaw from the floor.

Graves relaxes his face, and speaks for the first time. “Name.”

This time, Puritan Hat straightens up and answers, “Credence, sir. Credence Scamander.”

_ Scamander _ ? 

That’s the name of Tina’s friend, isn’t it? Younger brother of Theseus too. And… something else. He doesn’t see any resemblance to the Scamander he’s acquainted with, but pays little mind to it. Graves hadn’t had a look at the files of the new batch, but he’ll do so later and stores away the name.

Graves makes a grunt of acknowledgement and turns around, dismissing the group with a wave of his hand. Everyone is scared to even look at his face, and the group is out of his office in a hurry. Graves doesn’t fail to hear the frantic whispers of the newbies.

“What were you thinking??”

“You’re gonna be fired, oh Merlin!”

“Good luck, lad. Maybe we’ll see you in the Wand Permit Office.”

Graves scoffs and watches as the group heads out, his eyes stuck on Puritan Hat - Credence Scamander’s back as he walks off. He still has a smile on his face, chuckling to himself and appearing disconnected from the others even as they’re whispering sympathetic comments.

The Director later finds himself in a daze while he’s in another meeting with the Madame President.

“Graves? Graves,” Seraphina is unamused. She lets a paper mouse jump onto his face and Graves startles, setting the enchanted folded mouse on fire. She gives him an unimpressed face to match his unimpressed brows as the man brushes off the burnt ashes off them

“What.”

“You’re daydreaming. Have you met the graduates?”

“Yes.”

“And?”

“And what?”

“Clearly they, or at least one of them, have left an impression,” the President says.

“No, they’re the same,” Graves denies, shooting her a look. An expression is growing on Sera’s face and he doesn’t like it.

“You must have heard of the one particular graduate, then. Did you manage to pick him out?” Seraphina continues.

“All of them have terrible humour,” Graves grumbles, his way of saying he’s not impressed. But then he thinks of Puritan Hat and his laugh and is lost in thought again. Seraphina clears her throat and is clearly smirking. Graves thinks of setting her desk on fire next. 

“Well since he’s quite the star pupil,  _ I _ have decided that you, the Director, will have to see if he’s more than just a good student. I want you to watch over his progress, Director Graves,” Seraphina orders.

“You know I don’t read the files. Can’t you just tell me which one of them it is?”

“No. It’s not like you’d know their names anyway.”

Graves opens his mouth, almost about to mention Credence Scamander, but holds his tongue. Seraphina is looking at him expectantly, the smirk still on her face. He’s so going to put a sticky charm on her seat the next time.

Graves leaves the office feeling grumpy. Tina comes up to him with a nervous smile as she hands him some files.

“Tina,” the young Goldstein blinks up at him like a deer in headlights. “What would you say is my best asset.” Tina gives him a pained look, not quite a grimace and not quite a smile. She’s been on the receiving end of his jokes for the past couple of years since she became an Auror, but she still can’t quite hold her expressions like Seraphina does.

“Your uh,” Tina clears her throat and rubs at her brows pointedly. “Your uh, charm, sir. Very charismatic.” Graves rolls his eyes.

“I  _ know _ that, Porpentina. Anything else?” Graves sighs. Tina looks like she’s bit a lemon as she worries at her thin, furrowed brows and Graves resists asking if she’s having a case of itchy brows.

“I guess it’s your sense of humour,” Tina mumbles and Graves beams at her.

“I knew you would recognise it,” Graves grins and Tina laughs nervously. Graves thinks that he can do with impressing the newbies with more jokes.

“Of course, Mr. Graves,” Tina replies just as weakly. 

Graves, unfortunately, is occupied for the rest of the day and doesn’t see the newbies until the next morning. He’s already got more planned for them. He’s already sent out a charm that leaves cobwebs in the newbies’ lockers and desks, and also decides on his other favourite classic, Transfiguring his scorpion pins to spiders. He does find them quite adorable anyway, nevermind that they’re as large as his hands. It’s a bonus that his Aurors are scared of them. Or him. Same difference.

The freshies are no longer in a group; Graves has already spotted a couple of familiar faces paired up with their supervisors and mentors. He already hears the woes and complaints about the cobwebs and his supervising Aurors are smart enough not to tattle on who the culprit is. Most who see the Director give him a brittle smile as he delights in their souls dying inside as they watch the arachnids crawl up the side of his head. 

He spots a black blob at the corner of his eye - and it’s Puritan Hat Scamander.

He’s standing by the side of the office, still, hunched and nervous. Everyone is either ignoring him or avoiding the young man, who has such a dense, dreary atmosphere that Graves can almost see a literal cloud of gloom hovering over him. He looks more like a ghost than a fresh graduate, and he’s looking around anxiously. Graves doesn’t see whoever his supervisor is anywhere.

He doesn’t approach the kid, watching from the corner of his eye as Paloma Padfoot approaches him with papers and files of surveillance activity. The Surveillor is one of the very few who aren’t afraid of his spiders, and even gets his jokes. He likes her.

Graves sees Tina rushing in to the young man, looking flustered. She’s late, apparently. But Graves find himself extremely distracted when he sees the young man smile when Tina says something to him.

“Director?” Padfoot calls, her ribbon bobbing on her head as she looks concerned at his distraction. It helps bringing his attention back to her, since he remembers having charmed it to tug on her hair as one of his pranks when she first came to MACUSA.

Yes, Graves pranks almost everyone he comes across. He prides himself in his dedication.

“Everything looks fine, good job,” Graves comments absentmindedly, shoving the files back  to her. “The President will be pleased with your reports.” 

When he turns around, Tina and Scamander are walking towards him. Tina looks happy, and Scamander is holding a small, uncertain smile but yet to meet his eyes. He hears Padfoot humming interestedly behind him.

“Hello Paloma, Mr. Graves, this is Credence Scamander,” Tina introduces. She looks proud of the young man, excited too. “Credence is the top graduate from the Academy, and he’s -”

“There are spiders on you, sir?” Credence suddenly speaks up, looking at him with interest. Or rather, at the critters that are latched on his head. Credence doesn’t wait for his reply, boldly stepping forward and reaches up to pick the spiders from his head. He hears both Padfoot and Tina gasp while Graves is just fixated on this young man who’s grinning and playing with the spiders, treating them gently in his hands. “They’re very beautiful creatures.”

Graves thinks his heart skips a beat as he watches one of the spiders rest obediently on his palm, while the other crawls up his arm and Credence is  _ giggling _ .

“Are they your familiars, sir?” Credence asks, both unsure and shy as he looks up to Graves and Graves is  _ weak _ .

“You… you know what they say about spiders,” Graves replies distractedly, oblivious to the bewildered look on Tina’s face. Padfoot watches intently, her signature bow bobbing as if reflecting her interest.

“I’m afraid I don’t, sir?”

“Spiders are great for undercover work,” Graves says surely, remembering Tina mentioning of his greatest asset. He’s not trying to impress the boy or anything. “ _ Spy _ -ders are great for espionage and surveillance. Isn’t that right, Tina?”

Graves turns to Tina who is burying her face in her hands, pleased with his own joke. Padfoot snorts and covers her mouth with the paper reports.

Credence, though, is laughing. His whole body is shaking and the sound of his laughter so full of joy and bright in contrast to his initially gloomy disposition. Even the two women are staring at the young man with surprise.

“Someone actually laughed at Mr. Graves’ joke,” Graves hears Tina mutter and she’s really not as quiet as she thinks she is. 

“Ahem, I shall go then. Nice to meet you, Mr. Scamander,” Padfoot grins as she excuses herself and shoots Credence a wink. 

The Director later learns more about this strange young man.

He is, for sure, talented and skilled. He has no trouble in tracking down criminals and connecting the dots in cases. He’s wonderful in Charms and has a knack for creeping up on people, being one of the quietest persons around. Examiners and Surveillors have mentioned that the power in his spells are especially strong and dense, which makes him an asset in Duelling. 

His only detrimental factor is his apparent lack of confidence and extreme sense of modesty. Tina tries to build it up whenever Graves happen to walk past them (no, he’s not deliberately walking in the direction of wherever they are) and Credence seems to like her and follow her lead well. Tina may be a nervous mouse at times, but she’s a good Auror and Graves is confident in her ability to supervise.

The other Aurors and newbies avoid Credence like he’s the plague. If he weren’t an Auror, Graves figures he would be easy pickings for bullies. He’s already seen a couple of them shoving past the young man, but Credence doesn’t retaliate. He just shrinks back but gives them a look, and whatever they see there has them scurry away. He appears more like a ghost than a fresh-faced Auror, really. Graves is both curious and intrigued.

Graves finally reads Credence’s file. Apparently, he is a very strange and very special case.

Found and taken in by Newton Scamander, younger brother to the war hero and Auror Theseus Scamander, and is a British magizoologist. During his visit to the States half a decade ago, he found Credence living as a no-maj and is actually magic. The report is foggy about the details, especially at the lack of report to MACUSA about his being overlooked by Ilvermorny and the American wizarding community. 

Instead of Ilvermorny, Credence went through education in Hogwarts and was endorsed by Albus Dumbledore, a prominent figure, which is also impressive. His education was a crash course, apparently, cut short by ‘talent’ and had chosen to enter Auror Academy back in America. He topped in most of the disciplines, especially in Stealth and Tracking.

His records are outstanding, but there are many vague points about Credence Scamander. He’d have to have a talk with Limus if he has any more information about the young man’s identity.

In the meantime, Graves finds himself watching Credence more often. Seraphina ordered him to watch on the top graduate’s progress after all.

And even without her order, it’s not like he can help it; the kid is attractive and weird and both dark and bright at the same time. And he laughs at Graves’ jokes! He even loves his pet arachnids. What’s there to not like? His new colleagues don’t seem as keen about him, and he seems to mostly stick with Tina who appears to go the extra mile in watching over the young Auror.

Credence watches him too, not nearly as subtle as he thinks and Graves wonders if his results in Stealth are fake, or it’s deliberate on the younger man’s part. He smiles at Graves though, and if that doesn’t sway anyone, Graves would have to eat his shoe. Whatever gloom cloud that’s floating around the kid, it clears up almost immediately whenever the young Scamander smiles. It’s a wonder to Graves how not a lot of people see it.

But Graves keeps his distance for now and remain uninvolved. He still has to oversee the other newbies. They’ve been doing well, though the expected stumbles and errors still has Graves frowning and having the young ones scramble to fix their mistakes. He lightens up the office by charming squids in the toilets and delighting in their terrified and shocked squeals.

Seraphina begs him to get a better hobby. Graves begs to differ. 

Graves sets to prank the newbies and glamour them with his jokes at least once a week. It helps with the stress. Graves’ stress, mostly, but no one needs to know. At least  _ someone _ is laughing. 

Credence is the only consistent one who is genuinely amused by his pranks and jokes. Even his peers and colleagues and the Madame President are utterly perplexed at how anyone finds Graves funny. 

The Director thinks they’re missing out, and Credence is the only clever one who gets it. Graves absolutely  _ thrives _ on the giggles and the shy smiles. Credence is almost always with Tina whom he seems most comfortable with, but he seems to be relaxed in Graves’ presence while the others are more nervous. The young Auror has his own strange humour too, much to Graves’ enjoyment and Seraphina’s exasperation. They’re more catered a little more on the dark side but Graves adores those.

“What do you think of Queenie?” Auror Smith asks.

“Oh that gal is fine. Got my eye on Magali, though,” Auror Fischer says, looking dreamy.

“Crowe? She’s  _ hot _ .  What do you think, Scamander?” Smith turns to Credence with a grin, trying to include the pallid Auror.

“If it were a few hundred years ago, I'd say she’s hot enough to be on fire,” Credence tells them plainly and the other two stare at him confused, then at his Puritan hat that Credence is holding to his chest for a long moment before the dark joke sinks in and Fischer is looking aghast.

_ Did he just say what I think he said??  _ Fischer whispers to Smith who just laughs uncomfortably.

Graves (who just  _ happens _ to be passing by) had snorted and almost stopped in his tracks but managed to hurry away instead. It was a morbid joke, but what made him laugh was the flat, deadpan delivery Credence gave.

Credence’s humour is both dark and comes out of nowhere because no one expects it out of him. His earnest look and dry tone makes it hard for anyone to tell if the young man is kidding.

“What’s your best school subject, Scamander?”

“Spelling, sir.”

“Oh. Hexing or charms?”

“I went through a no-maj education, sir.”

Credence’s constipated, disappointed, and withering look leaves the other party thinking for a long time before he finally gets it and walks away. Graves had managed to stop from guffawing while Seraphina just shakes her head in exasperation.

Albert Perschky however comes up to him one day with an unusual report. The Apparition Examiner visits him in the office with Federal Identity Commissioner Limus in tow.

“Gentlemen,” Graves acknowledges with a raised brow, leveling them with his usual greeting of The Stare™. Perschky is unfazed while Limus cracks an uncertain smile. He’s the one who’s twitchy around Graves ever since he charmed his glasses to a snake as a joke and the serpent had curled around his head. The two bald, bespectacled men look so similar but Perschky is the one who doesn’t make any other expression that isn’t a disapproving smile. Graves has pulled a couple of jokes and pranks on both and he’s learned the Apparition Examiner just can’t be swayed. Making his bald head sparkle and shine didn’t budge him either. “How may I help you.”

“Director,” Limus is the one who speaks first. He places a brown folder with the name  _ Credence Scamander _ emblazoned across its cover. “You asked for his background. This is what I have found out.” Graves skims through it, then looks to Perschky questioningly.

“There is something strange in his magic,” Perschky states blandly.

“‘Strange’?”

“Have you not seen him Apparate? While we know he’s a top student, he is capable of Apparition without a wand, and whenever he does, there’s a strange, black smoke trailing him,” Perschky explains. “There’s a trace of something dark in it.”

“You sure it’s not his personality? The boy’s perpetually a walking rain cloud. He could be part Lethifold or a Dementor, for all we know,” Graves says jokingly. He notices Limus wince.

“You might want to read the files, Director,” the Commissioner suggests.

“We’re not saying he’s dangerous, but it’s something you the Director should know about,” Perschky continues sternly. Limus just nods beside him anxiously, a little more so than he usually is. Maybe it is something serious after all. Graves dismisses them both and takes his time to properly read the records.

Half an hour later, Graves is cursing under his breath. “The kid  _ is _ a fucking gloom cloud.”

\----

Graves summons Tina and Credence to his office the next day. Tina walks in the front, followed by Credence, as they both shuffle into his rigid, grey office. Credence pulls off his Puritan hat and clutches it to his chest anxiously. His hair is neatly cut and has just the slight waviness to it that makes it appealing.

“You called, Mr. Graves?” Tina asks, her expression straight but her eyes glassy with nerves.

“Miss Goldstein, how much do you know about Mr. Scamander?”

“Sir?” Tina asks, confused, looking to Credence, who has his head bowed and hands, held together tightly. His gloom cloud is in full steam. Graves laughs internally at his own puns. “What do you mean, Mr. Graves?”

“About his… special circumstances. You are close with Newton Scamander, yes? Did he mention to you that this young man was once a Barebone, and a ‘former Obscurial’? ” Tina looks shocked that Graves knows, but at the same time resigned as if she had expected to be caught eventually.

“S-sir, I- we can explain,” Tina starts.

“Credence,” Graves turns to the young man instead. It’s the first time he’d call out to the young Auror by his first name. “Do you have anything to say?”

“I'm no longer a Barebone, and I was adopted anyway. And - and I can control it - the Obscurus,” Credence replies promptly. He sounds sure and confident despite the slight stutter, unlike how Graves normally sees him. “It’s one with me. And I’ve proven myself more than enough times in my studies and in the Academy.”

Graves levels the young man with an intense Stare, his brows furrowed and eyes squinting so hard his face a mass of dark eyes and fuzzy eyebrows. The young man looks away, clearly trying not to laugh again. Graves is annoyed at himself for being weak for it, and he swears he’s not kidding around, he  _ is _ trying to cow the young Auror. Tina is looking nervously between them.

“That is true, you have impressive commendations and testimonials. I’m just curious whether they know about your situation and have willingly overlooked it.”

“Yes, they all know,” Tina answers for Credence. “Newt-Newton Scamander has gone through many lengths to prove that Credence is a capable wizard who will do no harm, and Credence has done all he can with his talents.”

Graves nods, agreeing. He’s seen it for himself. But to have a  _ former Obscurial  _ and also a former member - adoptive or not - of the Scourer clan in their midst is still a strange thing to grasp when they’re believed to be extinct for the last hundred years. “Do the others know?”

Tina shakes her head vehemently. “No sir.” Graves sighs and leans back in his chair.

“Are... we alright then?”

“No, you’re Tina, and he’s Credence,” Graves responds flatly. Tina just stares at him blankly and Credence is covering his mouth, laughing behind it. “You’re dismissed. And Credence?”

The young Auror looks back to him with a shy smile. “Yes, sir?”

“I’ll be watching you.”

“You have been, sir,” Credence tells him, and Graves thinks his cheeks warmed for a moment.

Seraphina later bugs him instead. Graves tries not to look too annoyed. She is his boss after all. He does tell her about Credence, and she looks alarmed as expected. After a lot of pacing, strong words, and some threats to certain departments, Graves manages to talk her down and calm her so she won’t fire his people. The Madame President looks more upset that she failed to notice any signs of a possible Obscurus than her employees failing to detect and inform her of its presence. But the Director has laid it out for her and things are under control; the Obscurial isn’t a threat and have been spoken for by at least one powerful and respected figure in the Wizarding World, so she accepts it begrudgingly. Seraphina says something that digs at Graves instead.

“It quite explains his sense of humour,” Seraphina hums as she looks pointedly at him with that smirk he hates so much. “I’m glad you found someone who understands your jokes, Graves.”

“There’s nothing wrong with  _ my _ jokes,” Graves grumbles. “You’re all plebeians.You need to refine  _ your _ sense of humour.”

Graves manages to see Credence in action in one of the tasks they’re sent on. Dark wizard smugglers have been making trouble and Graves has gathered his Aurors along with the freshies. Word from the Surveillors are that they’re smuggling illegal magical creatures and some of them are said to be dangerous.

He has Carneirus with him as they head to the warehouses at the docks. The Auror Captain is pretty straight-laced, all work and little play. Graves works with him often, being that he is the Captain of his goons (“Your  _ Aurors _ , Graves.”), but he remembers the man best by that time when he changed the Captain’s coffee into Gigglewater during a very boring meeting. Graves just didn’t expect the man to be an extreme lightweight and pass out after one sip. He got yelled at by the President, but it was worth it. 

When they reach the docks, the area is already cordoned off from by-standers of both the magical and non alike. The Aurors who are already there are in position and some have started duelling with the smugglers. Graves and Carneirus enter the fray.

Graves had thought they had the situation under control but the smugglers and dark wizards brought reinforcements. He spots Potter and Avery tag teaming a smuggler. He caught a glimpse of Lopez blasting another wizard from Spencer. He also recognizes Credence taking on three wizards at the same time and skilfully defeating them with finesse and strange magic. He’s impressed. His Aurors are doing well in fighting off the criminals, but they aren’t used to this many dark wizards. He sees a couple of his Aurors get knocked out and yells at Carneirus to have them retreat. And the worst has yet to come.

“Sir, they released Hidebehinds!” someone yells. Another curses.

“Language! And get Kneedander!” Carneirus bellows as he shoots a protection charm. Graves had had the Head of  Body for Protection of Magical Species Department on standby due to the nature of the smuggling, but they hadn’t known the identities of the creatures. Hidebehinds are spectre-like beasts that can  _ hide behind  _ anything for camouflage, and Graves would have appreciated the dumb name if they weren’t busy sneaking up on his Aurors to get their favourite taste of human flesh.

While he knows Kneedander would be up their asses later for hurting the creatures, Graves’ priority is the safety of his people, so he has no qualms in blasting the beasts back. He’s only one person though, and the beasts’ natural invisibility has made them tricky targets and have already led to a number of casualties.

Graves then spots a black figure gliding along in the shadowy corner of his eye like smoke. It’s Credence.

He’s approaching one of the Hidebehinds slow and carefully, his magic making his steps light and almost gliding, like a ghost. The boy’s pallid complexion does no favours to his image, but Graves thinks it suits him. He’s more stunned that the grey beast he’s approaching stops short and stares at Credence with little hostility, looking placated and almost friendly, even. Credence smiles and soon he has his hands on the ape-like beast, hands stroking gently over its head and the Hidebehind sits quietly, cooed at by the Auror. 

“Oh Morgana, is that your Auror?” Kneedander arrives, looking both flustered and livid at the chaotic scene. “Well, at least the young man has some good sense with magical creatures. Alright, the rest of you, get out of the  -  _ don’t hurt the Hidebehinds, dammit!” _

Kneedander is an older, experienced witch who is a force of nature. She’s more of a beast than the creatures she handles, and Graves has made the mistake of pranking her by Transfiguring one of her creatures once. He will never make the same error again. He still has itches thinking about it.

But the task is far from over yet. While the Magical Creatures Department handle the Hidebehinds, the dark wizard smugglers are still fighting back. He notices Tina trapped in a fight with two other wizards. One of them casts a countercurse, and the other throws a stunning spell, hitting Tina square in the shoulder. She goes down with a yelp. A massive cloud of black-red smoke bursts throughout the area. It’s the same smokey…  _ thing  _ that he’d noticed surrounding Credence when he approached the Hidebehind. It’s much bigger and more intimidating now, a dense fog of magic that Graves feels the heavy darkness in it, much like a corrupted curse but also senses something like a protective charm. 

“No!” he hears Tina cry out as the smoke spreads throughout the warehouse. Graves hears the surprised and fearful murmurs of his Aurors and distantly hears Kneedander discussing something urgently with Carneirus. The smoke, while intimidating, is only hostile towards the dark wizards and rounds them up, knocking a couple out and dragging them to the center of the docks, leaving them dazed. The smokey tendrils curl around their limbs like tentacles before pulling them across the ground, some of them unconscious, some of them screaming. 

Graves immediately Apparates to them, followed closely by Carneirus and the rest of his team. Tina is back on her feet and has her wand on the smugglers, the dark cloud still hovering over them, which has the the others nervous. Graves looks to Tina, catching her gaze, and Graves orders his men to arrest the criminals. 

“Credence?” Tina whispers as she watches the cloud over them. Everyone else is still enraptured as well. The black cloud moves, slow and liquid-like, and then it condenses into the shape of one Credence Scamander. Tina throws her arms around the young man in relief. Graves just stares until the two of them look to him guiltily like children caught red-handed. 

“That was...,” Graves is speechless for once. “I don’t know what to say.”

“I did transform into a black cloud and took out all the smugglers sir, so I wouldn’t blame you,” Credence says, a little self-deprecatingly.

“Pretty smoking, if you ask me,” Graves tells them much to Tina’s chagrin and Credence’s stunned stare. Graves ignores his other Aurors’ collective groan as he’s too busy watching Credence crumble into a full-bodied laughter. The young man appears relieved though, letting out everything in his laughing, wiping at his eyes.

“Mr. Graves, please…” the young man implores in between breathless laughs. Tina shakes her head as she steps back.

“As much as I appreciate the joke, Mr. Graves,” it’s Kneedander who comes up to interrupt them. “I would like to know what that was.”

All three of them straighten up. Graves orders Carneirus and the rest of his men away. Kneedander does the same. Seeing that she is the Head of her department, and he supposes an Obscurus  _ is _ a creature, she has the right to know.

“I am a former Obscurial, ma’am,” Credence speaks.

“A former  _ what _ ? Merlin and Morgana, and you think you should hide that from me!” Kneedander is a scary old witch when she wants to be, and Credence physically shrinks from her stern scolding. She turns and wags her finger at Graves. “And you! You didn’t think to inform me about this, too busy charming squids up the newbies’ buttocks!”

_ That _ garnered a snort from Tina, who is quickly silenced by Graves’ betrayed stare. However, the Head of BPMS Department switches her attention back to Credence who looks terrified.

“How did you know how to handle those Hidebehinds?” Kneedander asks, her tone softening.

“I spent a lot of time with magical creatures, ma’am,” Credence answers without stuttering despite his scared expression. “My adoptive... brother spends most of his time handling and studying them, and he brought me along.” That, Graves hadn’t known, and Kneedander scrutinizes him with a thoughtful hum.

“Scamander, right? If you mean your brother is Newton Scamander then I can see it, yes,” the older witch nods and relaxes, making all of them a little more at ease. “I ought to poach you from the Aurors. You would have done much better in my department than with the Director’s lot.” Credence smiles tentatively and receives an unexpected hug and a sincere smile from the older witch before she hurries off to take care of the illegal creatures procured from the smugglers.

The three of them are left stunned and speechless. “I think that meant she’s taken you in as one of her creatures,” Graves tells Credence, who’s flushed from what just happened. It’s an endearing look on the young man.

After the whole debacle, Graves notices that there’s a change among his Aurors. Credence Scamander gets pulled into more cliques and appears to receive more attention than the little that he did before. Carneirus takes the young man seriously after having seen his skills and Kneedander actively seeks him out for inquiries and conversation. The young man seems to welcome the attention, even if he looks uncomfortable with it initially, and his perpetual gloom cloud is chased away to reveal a smiling young man with a dark sense of humour.

Graves is almost jealous. Seraphina snickers at him. Graves retaliates by sending her exploding paper rats.

Credence remains as the only one who cares or responds appropriately to Graves’ little hijinks. Whenever Graves is around, the young man shoots him a joke and even if they laugh only between themselves while the others groan in exasperation, Graves likes it. Scratch that, he absolutely  _ loves _ it.

When Credence laughs he laughs with his entire body, brightening up not only his usually dreary demeanour but he’s sure others are affected too. He’s seen Tina’s soft look towards the younger man, Carneirus’ smirk or even Kneedander’s milder huff. Graves finds himself seeking Credence just to share whatever jokes and prank ideas he has in mind.

Graves  _ likes _ the young man. His skill, his demeanor, his polite manner of speaking, his  _ humour _ . And maybe he’s becoming a little too obvious that the entire department seems to have picked up on it.

“Hey Director Graves, where’s your favourite boy?”

“Hello Mr. Graves, have you seen Credence?”

“Good morning, Sir, should I send Scamander to your office with your coffee?”

They’re definitely teasing him. All of them. 

Graves shows them their place by slipping the hottest peppers in everyone’s coffee. He smiles when he sees everyone with swollen lips, running noses and fighting for the toilets. He’s made sure to add the squids in there too. Seraphina is  _ livid _ but Graves grins when he sees her sweating from the pepper.

What he doesn’t expect, is the swollen lips on Credence, who is also unfortunately a victim of his prank. Puffy eyed, nose running and lips swollen red from the spice. Graves never realized he would find such a sight endearing. He had thought of many things about Credence before, and while some were mildly inappropriate, the new image his little prank had offered him has thrown the man off the cliff and he’s trying not to show it in his face.

The pepper crisis is over by the end of the day much to MACUSA’s relief, but it seems that Graves is not the only prankster.

The next day finds Graves with white blond hair, a white, pencil moustache and mismatched coloured eyes. He looks absolutely surreal and horrific. He hates it. And he makes it known as he stomps through the headquarters, everyone running out of his way. Seraphina laughs in his face but doesn’t own up to it. The only other person who dares to do that would be a certain Credence Scamander.

When he summons the young man to his office, Credence is laughing. He’s obviously the culprit.

Even Tina, who had insisted on accompanying the young Auror since she most likely knew about the prank, is scrambling to cover up for Credence while the young man is blissfully unaware of his mentor’s anxiety, still snickering behind her. “Oh Mr. Graves, he’s just playing you know, and-and, you don’t look uh, too bad?”

“You look terrible, Mr. Graves, it’s almost scary,” Credence insists in between laughs, ignoring the panicked shush from Tina.

“And just when did you do this prank?” Graves asks, narrowing his eyes and bleached brows furrowing into a white mass.

“Your morning coffee, sir,” Credence clears his throat, but still smiling. His face is flushed from laughing so hard, and he looks absolutely beautiful.  Graves can’t help but stare.

“You’re lucky I like you,” Graves grumbles, and  _ that _ startles both Aurors in front of him, effectively quieting both of them. Tina is staring open mouthed at her boss, and Credence’s eyes are as wide as saucers, a little glassy. Shit, did he just say that out loud? 

“I mean,” Graves coughs and pulls his meanest frown, “I am fond of you, Credence, or I would have demoted you ages ago.” Wait, that isn’t helping either! Tina coughs as awkwardly as he did and turns to Credence.

“I think you should change Mr. Graves back to normal, Credence,” she says in a hushed whisper. Graves thinks he sees her smile. She hurries off and leaves them alone in Graves’ office. 

A stilted silence hangs over them. Credence is blushing the reddest he’d seen on the young man. Eventually he gathers his courage and apologizes.

“Sorry, Director Graves,” Credence says with a shy smile, and with his wand, does a light flick over Graves’ face. He feels his appearance change, like a shroud pulled off. He feels relieved and lighter. But there’s still the matter of Credence. “You look much more handsome like this, Mr. Graves.”

And it’s Graves’ turn to blush, finding himself looking at his own shoes. He hasn’t felt like this since Ilvermorny.

“Yes, well,” Graves mutters. He sees Credence’s feet take a step forward and the older man looks up. Credence is much closer.

“Um, Mr. Graves?”

“Yes, Auror Scamander?”

“Please call me by my name,” the younger man requests. His eyes are bright and brown, almost like heated bronze. A very beautiful man, even with the gloom and black cloud and funeral clothes. Graves clears his throat and corrects himself.

“Yes, Credence?”

“Permission to kiss you, sir?” Credence asks, blinking and looking shyer this time. Graves smiles.

“Call me by my name, Credence.”

“P-Percival,” Credence utters, his blush flaring anew, and Graves’ formerly cold heart melts. Maybe they fit, a hot black cloud warming up a block of ice. 

When Graves finally does give the younger man permission, he spies Seraphina’s familiar paper eagle at his desk. He can almost sense the smug smirk coming from it as it flaps its paper wings.

Before anyone hears any news of this and tease him for it, Graves floods the whole of MACUSA, especially the Madame President’s office, with paper confetti. If anyone asks if he’s feeling particularly festive or have the need to celebrate something, Graves sends them away with a sinister smile.

No one says a thing about Credence who looks more flustered by the Director’s side as of late.


End file.
